Oh, how selfish am I?
God has taken a hold of my heart this morning to show me how truly selfish I am. I am not in a place in my walk of faith that I need to be. I have worried over things going on in my life that are out of my control. Asking God to take hold, but trying to direct His way.
Worrying over what is mine and things I may loose. Convicted this morning that nothing is mine, it is all His and I have to surrender my everything. Take up my cross and follow Him. He took up His cross and said "My heart is ready, Father." He gave His life so that I could have mine. What an ultimate sacrifice He made.
This morning I stumbled across a devotional that touched me in ways I can not express. God led me to a place on His "Resurrection Day" that blindsided me. Thinking and wanting to be inspired by His death and resurrection led me to see what I must do to "die to myself" so that I may be reborn. Honestly, "my heart was not ready" for this. My conviction took hold of my heart and grabbed it like a vice, honest pain surged through me. Pain from shame and fear. Shame, for my actions and the realization that there are times in my life that I do not fully trust. Fear, that I would lose hope should I be called to suffer greatly for my Lord.
I ask that you read the following post:
http://www.incourage.me/2010/04/loss-and-resurrection.html
It really touched me this morning. It showed me where I fail as a Christian. I am thankful for Christ's ultimate sacrifice and His resurrection that showed me how to really follow Him.
May it show you the things in your life that you need to surrender so you may be resurrected. God Bless!
Sunday, April 4, 2010
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Lighthearted
Yellows, Blues, Greens, and Reds
With the sun shining and the weather warmer, I am welcoming Spring with a gait in my step. Around me I am seeing the beauty of all of God’s wonderful creations. Grass is turning from dead to alive, flowers are blooming colors all around me, the days are longer and warmer and my heart is lighter.
My “wild” flower bouquet placed in my Mason jar lifts my spirit. The joy of this simplicity is more than I can explain. Sitting in my living room with only my screen door protecting me from the elements outside, keeping the bugs at bay and flooding my home with fresh air and sunshine is refreshing to my soul.
It is bliss with fruits and vegetables filling my belly, grilling fish and chicken and sitting down with family to share a meal. Flip flops as the only protection for my feet, and a splash of orange on my toes to brighten my mood. White tees and blue jeans rolled up, changing my hair color from drab to fab and the desire to get out and walk!
The simple fact that the noises (some funny, some beautiful) of the birds welcoming the day, are not an aggravation as they used to be when I was younger and demanded sleep. Seeing them fight over food and play tricks on one another to get the last bite makes me giggle.
Playing outside with my animals, seeing my nieces and nephews in their spring attire, Little League Baseball games, and red Georgia dirt dusting across my feet brings a smile across my face.
Little girls and boys are running in the yard laughing with fits of sneezes from pollen; the musical selection of nature’s symphony orchestrator.
Most of all, the warmth, the sights and smells, the comfort, the relaxation and the joy in my heart which reminds me of Easter. Dogwoods are in bloom with their little reminders to us of Christ’s crucifixion and the Sun bright and beaming, displaying the fulfillment of His resurrection.
These are my favorite things about Spring!
With the sun shining and the weather warmer, I am welcoming Spring with a gait in my step. Around me I am seeing the beauty of all of God’s wonderful creations. Grass is turning from dead to alive, flowers are blooming colors all around me, the days are longer and warmer and my heart is lighter.
My “wild” flower bouquet placed in my Mason jar lifts my spirit. The joy of this simplicity is more than I can explain. Sitting in my living room with only my screen door protecting me from the elements outside, keeping the bugs at bay and flooding my home with fresh air and sunshine is refreshing to my soul.
It is bliss with fruits and vegetables filling my belly, grilling fish and chicken and sitting down with family to share a meal. Flip flops as the only protection for my feet, and a splash of orange on my toes to brighten my mood. White tees and blue jeans rolled up, changing my hair color from drab to fab and the desire to get out and walk!
The simple fact that the noises (some funny, some beautiful) of the birds welcoming the day, are not an aggravation as they used to be when I was younger and demanded sleep. Seeing them fight over food and play tricks on one another to get the last bite makes me giggle.
Playing outside with my animals, seeing my nieces and nephews in their spring attire, Little League Baseball games, and red Georgia dirt dusting across my feet brings a smile across my face.
Little girls and boys are running in the yard laughing with fits of sneezes from pollen; the musical selection of nature’s symphony orchestrator.
Most of all, the warmth, the sights and smells, the comfort, the relaxation and the joy in my heart which reminds me of Easter. Dogwoods are in bloom with their little reminders to us of Christ’s crucifixion and the Sun bright and beaming, displaying the fulfillment of His resurrection.
These are my favorite things about Spring!
Monday, March 22, 2010
She Speaks
She writes, she speaks and she ministers. She allows God to use her through the talents He has given her.
When I began this blog it was for two reasons:
1. To glorify God
2. To quench the thirst I've had since the age of 10 to write, write, write.
I am by no means an accomplished writer. However, I express myself best when I write. I am not too great at speaking how I am feeling because when I have emotions, they are too strong to put in to verbal communication. Therefore, I have always written how I feel.
I have this yearning within to get to the place in my life where God is using me through giving. A place to help others, to further His kingdom, and to share my stories the only way I know how...writing! But I would love to learn how to communicate His love verbally, also.
Last year I stumbled across Proverbs31 Ministries. Most of you know that, for I shared my findings with you. One of the fabulous "events" (if you will) is a conference called She Speaks.
Here is a little of the information on the conference I gathered from Proverbs31 website:
She Speaks is a life-changing conference for women of every generation seeking to explore the tug on her heart to reach out to the world for Jesus. Through She Speaks, Proverbs 31 Ministries encourages and equips women who are called by God to share our mission to bring God’s peace, perspective and purpose to today’s busy woman. Sharing God’s truth with love is not only a holy calling but a remarkable responsibility. We believe by equipping women to become more effective at sharing the Word of God, we multiply our efforts to reach a hurting world with the life-transforming hope of Jesus.
A fabulous opportunity has come for me and women like me. A scholarship to attend the She Speaks conference. WOOOHOOO!!!!! An opportunity to learn how to sharpen my writing skills and to gain knowledge on verbally sharing God's love!!! How exciting.
I am applying for this scholarship due to my current financial state. Followers of my blog have learned a little bit about me over the past year and my situation. For those of you who do not, long story short.
1. Two year tug in my heart to leave my job and stay at home.
2. Prayer and searching for God's guidance opens up a door for my dream to be fulfilled.
3. Six months later (last Feb.) with economy crash, hubby lost his job.
4. Husband unemployed for 11+ months.
5. A constant giver having to learn to receive...hard lesson.
6. Husband got a job 4 months ago.
7. Trying to catch up on bills
So.....needless to say, I am hoping that if it is God's will, He will allow this chance for me. Who is to say? It could happen. If not, God knows other women who will benefit from it more than I. Either way, it is a great thing those Proverbs 31 staffers are doing.
http://www.proverbs31.org/
http://lysaterkeurst.blogspot.com/2010/03/she-speaks-scholarship-contest.html
When I began this blog it was for two reasons:
1. To glorify God
2. To quench the thirst I've had since the age of 10 to write, write, write.
I am by no means an accomplished writer. However, I express myself best when I write. I am not too great at speaking how I am feeling because when I have emotions, they are too strong to put in to verbal communication. Therefore, I have always written how I feel.
I have this yearning within to get to the place in my life where God is using me through giving. A place to help others, to further His kingdom, and to share my stories the only way I know how...writing! But I would love to learn how to communicate His love verbally, also.
Last year I stumbled across Proverbs31 Ministries. Most of you know that, for I shared my findings with you. One of the fabulous "events" (if you will) is a conference called She Speaks.
Here is a little of the information on the conference I gathered from Proverbs31 website:
She Speaks is a life-changing conference for women of every generation seeking to explore the tug on her heart to reach out to the world for Jesus. Through She Speaks, Proverbs 31 Ministries encourages and equips women who are called by God to share our mission to bring God’s peace, perspective and purpose to today’s busy woman. Sharing God’s truth with love is not only a holy calling but a remarkable responsibility. We believe by equipping women to become more effective at sharing the Word of God, we multiply our efforts to reach a hurting world with the life-transforming hope of Jesus.
A fabulous opportunity has come for me and women like me. A scholarship to attend the She Speaks conference. WOOOHOOO!!!!! An opportunity to learn how to sharpen my writing skills and to gain knowledge on verbally sharing God's love!!! How exciting.
I am applying for this scholarship due to my current financial state. Followers of my blog have learned a little bit about me over the past year and my situation. For those of you who do not, long story short.
1. Two year tug in my heart to leave my job and stay at home.
2. Prayer and searching for God's guidance opens up a door for my dream to be fulfilled.
3. Six months later (last Feb.) with economy crash, hubby lost his job.
4. Husband unemployed for 11+ months.
5. A constant giver having to learn to receive...hard lesson.
6. Husband got a job 4 months ago.
7. Trying to catch up on bills
So.....needless to say, I am hoping that if it is God's will, He will allow this chance for me. Who is to say? It could happen. If not, God knows other women who will benefit from it more than I. Either way, it is a great thing those Proverbs 31 staffers are doing.
http://www.proverbs31.org/
http://lysaterkeurst.blogspot.com/2010/03/she-speaks-scholarship-contest.html
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
When we are wronged
Our lives changed in an instant. Out of nowhere; heartache, lies, betrayal and fear gripped our family tight and did not want to let go. I have always heard the saying “Your life can change in an instant.” I have never really known just how drastically that can happen. Someone we loved and cared for, someone we took in to our home and our life, stabbed us in the back and did not stay to clean up the mess. This someone instantly fled and did not look back.
To say I was shocked is putting it mildly. I walked in a living nightmare for weeks, as did my family. As anyone who loves knows, when someone messes with your family, defense mechanisms kick in. Well defensiveness does not come alone. He brings with him a suitcase full of anger, tears, fear and numbness. Every negative emotion that one can feel floods the soul. How dangerous that can be.
I was so angry at this person who attempted to destroy our lives. So angry at the one who trampled on my loved ones heart and attempted to smear their reputation. I wanted to let them have it and have it GOOD! One day I was searching God’s word for direction and His peace since I was not doing too well at getting by on my own. I ran across Matthew 5:44 (ESV) which says “But I say to you, Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.” I need to admit that I knew this was not going to be easy. Praying for them was one thing, but love them, too?
A few days later I was sitting in church listening to my pastor speak on love. He made several references to God’s commandment for us to love one another. I buckled up, grabbed the pew and held my breath for what I knew God wanted me to hear. My pastor said “When we love God; loving others, even those who persecute us, becomes easier.” What a revelation to me. Of course, I love God. He is my friend and my Savior. Even over the past couple of weeks I never hated this person, but my feelings towards them were less than loving. It made me stop and evaluate the way that I was praying for them. Was it in a loving manner? No, I admit, it was not.
When I prayed for this person I continually prayed for their eyes to be opened to the heartache and tragedy they caused us. I prayed for them to reap the things they sowed in to our lives. I do not personally think that asking the Lord to open their eyes to see what they did is wrong. However, I realized that I was not trusting God’s word when He tells us “Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, “Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.” (Romans 12:19, ESV)
God plainly tells us that He will take care of those who have wronged us and that while He does that; we need to concentrate on loving them.
Leviticus 19:18 ESV ”You shall not take vengeance or bear a grudge against the sons of your own people, but you shall love your neighbor as yourself: I am the Lord.”
1 Peter 2:23 ESV / When he was reviled (hated), he did not revile in return; when he suffered, he did not threaten, but continued entrusting himself to him who judges justly.
When I walked out of the church that day, I felt more of a peace about the situation than I had in weeks. I knew God wanted me to hear His word that day and it is by no coincidence that my pastor spoke on love in all forms, even towards our enemies.
When we are wronged, it hurts. It cuts deep and the wound feels open and fleshy for a while. It seems that our minds resort to going over and over and over the hurt, the pain, and even replaying the incident. What God showed me further confirms His love for me. God wants us to love those who hate, hurt, and defile us because loving them produces great things.
1.It honors God. It shows Him we trust His word and we love Him.
2.It heals our wounds quicker. It takes the negative and replaces it with peace and positivity.
I am not sure that I will ever fully get to a place in my life where I will forget what happened. However, I am called to love them, pray for them and their salvation and forgive them. It is what God commands we do. He commands it because He loved us enough while we were still sinners to send His son to die for us. I had to learn that God made, loves and died for my persecutor, too. By loving God and obeying His word, I should have no problem lovingly praying for my persecutor.
To say I was shocked is putting it mildly. I walked in a living nightmare for weeks, as did my family. As anyone who loves knows, when someone messes with your family, defense mechanisms kick in. Well defensiveness does not come alone. He brings with him a suitcase full of anger, tears, fear and numbness. Every negative emotion that one can feel floods the soul. How dangerous that can be.
I was so angry at this person who attempted to destroy our lives. So angry at the one who trampled on my loved ones heart and attempted to smear their reputation. I wanted to let them have it and have it GOOD! One day I was searching God’s word for direction and His peace since I was not doing too well at getting by on my own. I ran across Matthew 5:44 (ESV) which says “But I say to you, Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.” I need to admit that I knew this was not going to be easy. Praying for them was one thing, but love them, too?
A few days later I was sitting in church listening to my pastor speak on love. He made several references to God’s commandment for us to love one another. I buckled up, grabbed the pew and held my breath for what I knew God wanted me to hear. My pastor said “When we love God; loving others, even those who persecute us, becomes easier.” What a revelation to me. Of course, I love God. He is my friend and my Savior. Even over the past couple of weeks I never hated this person, but my feelings towards them were less than loving. It made me stop and evaluate the way that I was praying for them. Was it in a loving manner? No, I admit, it was not.
When I prayed for this person I continually prayed for their eyes to be opened to the heartache and tragedy they caused us. I prayed for them to reap the things they sowed in to our lives. I do not personally think that asking the Lord to open their eyes to see what they did is wrong. However, I realized that I was not trusting God’s word when He tells us “Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, “Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.” (Romans 12:19, ESV)
God plainly tells us that He will take care of those who have wronged us and that while He does that; we need to concentrate on loving them.
Leviticus 19:18 ESV ”You shall not take vengeance or bear a grudge against the sons of your own people, but you shall love your neighbor as yourself: I am the Lord.”
1 Peter 2:23 ESV / When he was reviled (hated), he did not revile in return; when he suffered, he did not threaten, but continued entrusting himself to him who judges justly.
When I walked out of the church that day, I felt more of a peace about the situation than I had in weeks. I knew God wanted me to hear His word that day and it is by no coincidence that my pastor spoke on love in all forms, even towards our enemies.
When we are wronged, it hurts. It cuts deep and the wound feels open and fleshy for a while. It seems that our minds resort to going over and over and over the hurt, the pain, and even replaying the incident. What God showed me further confirms His love for me. God wants us to love those who hate, hurt, and defile us because loving them produces great things.
1.It honors God. It shows Him we trust His word and we love Him.
2.It heals our wounds quicker. It takes the negative and replaces it with peace and positivity.
I am not sure that I will ever fully get to a place in my life where I will forget what happened. However, I am called to love them, pray for them and their salvation and forgive them. It is what God commands we do. He commands it because He loved us enough while we were still sinners to send His son to die for us. I had to learn that God made, loves and died for my persecutor, too. By loving God and obeying His word, I should have no problem lovingly praying for my persecutor.
Friday, March 12, 2010
Acceptance
John 6:37 "All those who the Father gives me will come to me. Him who comes to me I will in no way throw out."
God tells us the greatest thing that we can do is to love. And love is a form of acceptance. To love our rowdy neighbor, aggravating relative, unlovable co-worker, and that irritating lady everyone jokes is showing love through Christ. In fact, "love your neighbor" is one of God’s greatest commandments given to us. Our acceptance of others shows the world there is something different about us. It makes people curious. When we are seen talking, hugging or sitting next to the “different” woman/man/child who stumbled in to the school meeting or who we invited to church, it speaks volumes of God’s love.
Jesus accepted everyone. He was seen talking to the woman at the well, who had been married five times and living with a man whom she was not married to. He was seen inviting himself to the house of a tax collector, who by the way was extremely very short. God even tells us in Hebrews 13:2 - "Do not forget to entertain strangers, for by so doing some people have entertained angels without knowing it."
It is important that we are accommodating of all God’s creatures. Acceptance holds great meaning! It shows a great witness to others of God, it gives someone who is “unacceptable” a feeling of worth, and it holds blessings for you! Since we are to be Christ like, we are to be accepting. Jesus touched the untouchable (lepers) and He talked to the unclean (sinners). Jesus is no respecter of persons. To accept everyone, to love the sinner but hate the sin enough to witness; that is being Christ like and radiates God’s love for all.
God tells us the greatest thing that we can do is to love. And love is a form of acceptance. To love our rowdy neighbor, aggravating relative, unlovable co-worker, and that irritating lady everyone jokes is showing love through Christ. In fact, "love your neighbor" is one of God’s greatest commandments given to us. Our acceptance of others shows the world there is something different about us. It makes people curious. When we are seen talking, hugging or sitting next to the “different” woman/man/child who stumbled in to the school meeting or who we invited to church, it speaks volumes of God’s love.
Jesus accepted everyone. He was seen talking to the woman at the well, who had been married five times and living with a man whom she was not married to. He was seen inviting himself to the house of a tax collector, who by the way was extremely very short. God even tells us in Hebrews 13:2 - "Do not forget to entertain strangers, for by so doing some people have entertained angels without knowing it."
It is important that we are accommodating of all God’s creatures. Acceptance holds great meaning! It shows a great witness to others of God, it gives someone who is “unacceptable” a feeling of worth, and it holds blessings for you! Since we are to be Christ like, we are to be accepting. Jesus touched the untouchable (lepers) and He talked to the unclean (sinners). Jesus is no respecter of persons. To accept everyone, to love the sinner but hate the sin enough to witness; that is being Christ like and radiates God’s love for all.
Thursday, February 18, 2010
On a break
I am taking a leave from posting blogs here for a while...not really sure when I will return. I am seeking and praying as a lot is going on in my life and I need clarity. I will write more when I feel led by God to do so. It may be in 10 minutes, it may be in 10 weeks...but I wanted to let you all know I am taking a break. God Bless
Monday, February 1, 2010
Fact or Fiction? You Choose!
"I’m just too far out of your league.” “Yes, that dress makes you look fat.” These are just a few of the sayings on the cover of the newly released movie The Invention of Lying. I grabbed the movie, wanting to check it out and see what a world full of honesty would look like. After reading the description on the back of the cover, I figured it would be a pretty harmless movie because the guy who “invents” lying is described as “creating a world where he could get anything he wants….well, almost anything.”
So I figured, it would have a great ending showing how lying is wrong. I don’t know what happened at the end because I cut it off half-way through. The movie seemed pretty decent until his mother is dying and to stop her from being fearful of death he “lies” and says that she will not go to a place of nothingness for eternity. Instead she will go to a place where all her loved ones before her have gone and she will live in a mansion. This revelation sparks media frenzy and he is forced to “lie” further and tell the whole world what happens to us after we die…thus creating “heaven and hell.” This movie really burned my buttons and I had to cut it off.
But it did spark a few thoughts in my mind about lying and how dangerous it can really be. Lying can corrupt the true being of who we are. We are given free-will to make decisions concerning our life and how our choices affect the lives of others. Every time we tell a lie, it goes against the morals that are instilled within us. Little white lies can turn in to larger and more harmful lies. At times, our lies can put us in a situation where we are found out and that will make people deem us as less than trustworthy.
But what about those harmless lies to make another person feel better? Is that okay? Well, what are our true motives? If we really think about it, lying to make someone feel better about who they are also makes us feel good, as well. It takes the pressure of being put on the spot off of us. We want to be seen as a good person and not someone who is hurtful or rude.
One thing that occurred in this movie was the constant and unending telling of the truth. Some of the things that were said were absolutely unnecessary. Truth was offered even if a question was never asked. It seems every little thought that came to mind was spit out without regard to the company being kept. Telling the truth to be hateful is just as bad as lying.
We all dislike deception. I love to write and cook. I know that at times neither is perfect or anywhere close to good. I would rather someone speak honestly to me about what I am doing wrong than to ignore it all together. So if I ask, “how was it?” Instead of a simple “Fine!” I want to hear what was wrong so I can improve upon it. Telling the truth can be done harmlessly and with tact. Constantly speaking the truth when not asked for it can make us appear mean or insensitive. But if asked for our honest opinion, we should give it out of love and respect while still regarding ones feelings. Speaking out of love, respecting someone enough to look them in the eyes, giving an example of what we may have done wrong in the past and what we learned from it, and allowing the person time to digest what we have said is better than lying.
Just because we may not like something someone has done it doesn’t mean we dislike the person all together. We can tell the truth in a reverent manner without making someone feel like a failure.
Proverbs 24:28 tells us “Do not be a witness against your neighbor without cause, And do not deceive with your lips.” Plainly put; don’t lie about something you aren’t sure about and don’t lie when asked for the truth.
So I figured, it would have a great ending showing how lying is wrong. I don’t know what happened at the end because I cut it off half-way through. The movie seemed pretty decent until his mother is dying and to stop her from being fearful of death he “lies” and says that she will not go to a place of nothingness for eternity. Instead she will go to a place where all her loved ones before her have gone and she will live in a mansion. This revelation sparks media frenzy and he is forced to “lie” further and tell the whole world what happens to us after we die…thus creating “heaven and hell.” This movie really burned my buttons and I had to cut it off.
But it did spark a few thoughts in my mind about lying and how dangerous it can really be. Lying can corrupt the true being of who we are. We are given free-will to make decisions concerning our life and how our choices affect the lives of others. Every time we tell a lie, it goes against the morals that are instilled within us. Little white lies can turn in to larger and more harmful lies. At times, our lies can put us in a situation where we are found out and that will make people deem us as less than trustworthy.
But what about those harmless lies to make another person feel better? Is that okay? Well, what are our true motives? If we really think about it, lying to make someone feel better about who they are also makes us feel good, as well. It takes the pressure of being put on the spot off of us. We want to be seen as a good person and not someone who is hurtful or rude.
One thing that occurred in this movie was the constant and unending telling of the truth. Some of the things that were said were absolutely unnecessary. Truth was offered even if a question was never asked. It seems every little thought that came to mind was spit out without regard to the company being kept. Telling the truth to be hateful is just as bad as lying.
We all dislike deception. I love to write and cook. I know that at times neither is perfect or anywhere close to good. I would rather someone speak honestly to me about what I am doing wrong than to ignore it all together. So if I ask, “how was it?” Instead of a simple “Fine!” I want to hear what was wrong so I can improve upon it. Telling the truth can be done harmlessly and with tact. Constantly speaking the truth when not asked for it can make us appear mean or insensitive. But if asked for our honest opinion, we should give it out of love and respect while still regarding ones feelings. Speaking out of love, respecting someone enough to look them in the eyes, giving an example of what we may have done wrong in the past and what we learned from it, and allowing the person time to digest what we have said is better than lying.
Just because we may not like something someone has done it doesn’t mean we dislike the person all together. We can tell the truth in a reverent manner without making someone feel like a failure.
Proverbs 24:28 tells us “Do not be a witness against your neighbor without cause, And do not deceive with your lips.” Plainly put; don’t lie about something you aren’t sure about and don’t lie when asked for the truth.
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